2/23/10 Midafternoon Report: Consumers are very confident in the economy...
The market has hit a speed bump today as consumer confidence fell to its lowest level in 10 months. Consumers are now less confident than a slightly overweight 16 year old girl with bad acne and a...
View Article3/8/10 Midafternoon Report: Market more mixed than reviews of Oscar telecast...
The market is quiet today, likely still in bed after staying up all night to watch something called The Hurt Locker win so many Oscars that that the people who couldn’t get tickets to Avatar may now go...
View Article5/5/10 Midday Report: Investors celebrate May 5th with Sink-o de Marketo...
Buenos dias on this lovely Cinqo de Mayo as investors smack the market like a pinata in hopes of breaking it open to catch some falling CDS. Things remain ugly today as Europe is still on the verge of...
View Article8/9/10 Midafternoon Report: The (money) shot Hurd around the world
With little macro data out today, the big news in the market is that HP CEO Mark Hurd resigned due to a sexual harrassment discrimination suit that seemed to involve less sex than Bill Clinton’s...
View Article8/27/10 Midday Report: Economy GDPeed on
The market was up today despite the government lowering their forecast of Q2 GDP to 1.6%, down from the 2.4% they fabricated last month and likely up from the lower number they will make up next month...
View Article9/20/10 Midevening Report: NBER said recession ended 15 months ago, also said...
The market melted up to a four month high today as technical levels were tripped after investors dropped some funny looking mushrooms in to the market’s salad, President Obama had an hour long town...
View Article9/23/10 Midevening Report: Housing and employment continue to struggle, but...
Ho fucking hum. Another day with more of the same news including bad unemployment numbers, bad housing data, and likely bad promises of a still unreleased Karissa Shannon sex tape (and it’s not even...
View Article11/9/10 Midevening Report: As QE2 Hangover Wears Off, Will Market Wake Up in...
It was another lackluster day in the market as investors are still trying to regain their bearings from last week’s quadruple news high of elections, QE2, the jobs report, and Kat Dennings nude photos...
View Article12/13/10 Midnight Report: Market Has a Case of the Mondays
Not much happened in the market today as volume was lighter than the audience for a Hasselhoff reality TV show (and also about 900 IQ points higher) as investors continue to sit on their laurels (and...
View Article3/28/11 Midnight Report: Same Shit, Different Day
The market rose for most of the day like the radiation readings from the Fukushima Dai-ichi Nuclear Power Plant (where engineers recently found plutonium in the soil which is either from the nuclear...
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